Snoring

My wife says that I snore. I don't think that I do. Yesterday we were at Wal-Mart, and she insisted that we buy Breathe Right nasal strips. You know, the stuff that football players wear? So I caved, and we bought a box. So last night she made me wear one to bed. But evidently I stuck it on the wrong part of my nose, so I had to put on another. I figured if I had to wear the strips, I might as well complete the ensemble and put some black markings beneath my eyes so I could have some super cool football dreams. So I did, but no such luck - I dreamt about numbers.

Well in the morning, I could barely get the strips off and when I did, my nose was covered with a nasty sticky residue. Since I've started this stay-at-home thing, I've dropped my bathing frequency from once every 1-2 days, to once a week. You know, to save energy... I'm totally green like that. Well luckily today is shower day, and I was able to get the residue (and black marker) off my face. I don't think I could go on wearing these everyday... by the time I get to my next weekly shower, I'd have a collection of lint, hairs, dirt and other oddities on my sticky nose.

Sticking these strips to my nose reminded me of those Biore Pore Perfect Strips. Remember the commercial? "It's like a forest of blackheads!" Seems as though someone could figure out a way to combine those two products into one. Then football players and (allegedly) snoring men, could simultaneously care for their t-zones. Just a thought.